We Thought You Would Be Prettier
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We Thought You Would Be Prettier
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Author : Laurie Notaro
language : en
Publisher: Villard
Release Date : 2005-04-19
We Thought You Would Be Prettier written by Laurie Notaro and has been published by Villard this book supported file pdf, txt, epub, kindle and other format this book has been release on 2005-04-19 with Biography & Autobiography categories.
She thought she’d have more time. Laurie Notaro figured she had at least a few good years left. But no–it’s happened. She has officially lost her marbles. From the kid at the pet-food store checkout line whose coif is so bizarre it makes her seethe “I’m going to kick his hair’s ass!” to the hapless Sears customer-service rep on the receiving end of her Campaign of Terror, no one is safe from Laurie’s wrath. Her cranky side seems to have eaten the rest of her–inner-thigh Chub Rub and all. And the results are breathtaking. Her riffs on e-mail spam (“With all of these irresistible offers served up to me on a plate, I WANT A PENIS NOW!!”), eBay (“There should be an eBay wading pool, where you can only bid on Precious Moments figurines and Avon products, that you have to make it through before jumping into the deep end”), and the perils of St. Patrick’s Day (“When I’m driving, the last thing I need is a herd of inebriates darting in and out of traffic like loaded chickens”) are the stuff of legend. And for Laurie, it’s all true.
We Thought You Would Be Prettier
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Author : Laurie Notaro
language : en
Publisher: National Geographic Books
Release Date : 2005-04-19
We Thought You Would Be Prettier written by Laurie Notaro and has been published by National Geographic Books this book supported file pdf, txt, epub, kindle and other format this book has been release on 2005-04-19 with Biography & Autobiography categories.
She thought she’d have more time. Laurie Notaro figured she had at least a few good years left. But no–it’s happened. She has officially lost her marbles. From the kid at the pet-food store checkout line whose coif is so bizarre it makes her seethe “I’m going to kick his hair’s ass!” to the hapless Sears customer-service rep on the receiving end of her Campaign of Terror, no one is safe from Laurie’s wrath. Her cranky side seems to have eaten the rest of her–inner-thigh Chub Rub and all. And the results are breathtaking. Her riffs on e-mail spam (“With all of these irresistible offers served up to me on a plate, I WANT A PENIS NOW!!”), eBay (“There should be an eBay wading pool, where you can only bid on Precious Moments figurines and Avon products, that you have to make it through before jumping into the deep end”), and the perils of St. Patrick’s Day (“When I’m driving, the last thing I need is a herd of inebriates darting in and out of traffic like loaded chickens”) are the stuff of legend. And for Laurie, it’s all true.
Dorothy Fox
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Author : Mrs. Louisa Taylor Parr
language : en
Publisher:
Release Date : 1873
Dorothy Fox written by Mrs. Louisa Taylor Parr and has been published by this book supported file pdf, txt, epub, kindle and other format this book has been release on 1873 with categories.
Good Words
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Author :
language : en
Publisher:
Release Date : 1870
Good Words written by and has been published by this book supported file pdf, txt, epub, kindle and other format this book has been release on 1870 with categories.
Quills Pretence And Promises A Very Unusual Governess Lord Calthorpe S Promise
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Author : Sylvia Andrew
language : en
Publisher: HarperCollins Australia
Release Date : 2017-11-01
Quills Pretence And Promises A Very Unusual Governess Lord Calthorpe S Promise written by Sylvia Andrew and has been published by HarperCollins Australia this book supported file pdf, txt, epub, kindle and other format this book has been release on 2017-11-01 with Fiction categories.
A Very Unusual Governess Edward Barraclough's happy bachelor existence is thrown into a spin when he is forced to look after his two orphaned nieces. Employing the right governess is vital. Miss Petrie has the girls' support, while he has reservations. Unassuming and a little dowdy she may appear, but Edward suspects she's neither so humble nor respectful underneath! Independently wealthy Lady Octavia Petrie is on the verge of confessing that Edward has mistaken her for someone else. In a moment of sheer madness, prompted by his cynical attitude, she finds herself accepting the temporary position. From Lady to simple Miss – what has she let herself in for? Lord Calthorpe's Promise Lord Adam Calthorpe had been rash in his promise to look out for a fellow soldier's sister before the soldier was killed at the battle of Waterloo. For Miss Katharine Payne was a golden–eyed shrew who took genuine delight in flouting Adam's authority at every turn. Surely bringing her to stay with his mother would absolve him of his responsibilities – though he sincerely doubted such a headstrong young woman would ever find herself a husband. But when an unscrupulous man starts pursuing Katharine, Adam comes to realise that fulfilling his promise might actually involve marrying her himself...
Good Words
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Author :
language : en
Publisher:
Release Date : 1870
Good Words written by and has been published by this book supported file pdf, txt, epub, kindle and other format this book has been release on 1870 with English periodicals categories.
Library Journal
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Author : Melvil Dewey
language : en
Publisher:
Release Date : 2005
Library Journal written by Melvil Dewey and has been published by this book supported file pdf, txt, epub, kindle and other format this book has been release on 2005 with Electronic journals categories.
Includes, beginning Sept. 15, 1954 (and on the 15th of each month, Sept.-May) a special section: School library journal, ISSN 0000-0035, (called Junior libraries, 1954-May 1961). Also issued separately.
The Idiot Girl And The Flaming Tantrum Of Death
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Author : Laurie Notaro
language : en
Publisher: Villard
Release Date : 2008-06-24
The Idiot Girl And The Flaming Tantrum Of Death written by Laurie Notaro and has been published by Villard this book supported file pdf, txt, epub, kindle and other format this book has been release on 2008-06-24 with Biography & Autobiography categories.
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • Laurie Notaro has an uncanny ability to attract insanity—and leave readers doubled over with laughter. Need proof? Check out The Idiot Girl and the Flaming Tantrum of Death and try not to bust a gut. Join Notaro as she experiences the popular phenomenon of laser hair removal (because at least one of her chins should be stubble-free); bemoans the scourge of the Open Mouth Coughers on America’s airplanes and in similarly congested areas; welcomes the newest ex-con (yay, a sex offender!) to her neighborhood; and watches, against her own better judgment, every Discovery Health Channel special on parasites and tapeworms that has ever aired—resulting in an overwhelming fear that a worm the size of a python will soon come a-knocking on her back door. In Notaro’s world, strangers are stranger than fiction. One must always check the hotel bathroom for hobo hairs and consciously remember not to stare at old men with giant man-boobies. And then there are the lessons she has learned the hard way: Though it may seem like a good idea, it’s best not to hire a tweaked-out homeless guy to clean up your yard. The Plain Dealer says that Laurie Notaro is “a scream, the freak-magnet of a girlfriend you can’t wait to meet for a drink to hear her latest story.” With The Idiot Girl and the Flaming Tantrum of Death, Notaro proves she’s not only funny but resigned to the fact that you can’t look bad ass in a Prius. Don’t even try.
The Young Ladies Journal
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Author :
language : en
Publisher:
Release Date : 1892
The Young Ladies Journal written by and has been published by this book supported file pdf, txt, epub, kindle and other format this book has been release on 1892 with Clothing and dress categories.
Sunshine Conducted By W M Whittemore And Others
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Author : William Meynell Whittemore
language : en
Publisher:
Release Date : 1883
Sunshine Conducted By W M Whittemore And Others written by William Meynell Whittemore and has been published by this book supported file pdf, txt, epub, kindle and other format this book has been release on 1883 with categories.